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Case #7485950 – February 29th, 3:54 PM. Suspect is a woman over thirty. She identifies herself as Sovereign Syre and is filed under our Must Implement Liberal Frisking, or MILF, category. Upon search, the suspect complains that the Officer is touching her inappropriately and requests a female Officer. Suspect states that a contraception device is causing the metal detecting wand to go off, however it is soon discovered that stolen goods are the source. To avoid law enforcement prosecution, the suspect makes a deal with the Officer. The rest of this case is classified.
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